The Man I’ll Become

So I was reading the latest from Boundless and I came across this interesting quote:

In a Covenant Life Church podcast on courtship and community (given on 11-20-05), Joshua Harris pointed out that too many Christian women expect the young Christian men to be as mature and godly as the older men in the church who have been married for 10 or 15 years, and forget that they’ve had that 15 years and a wife to help them to where they are. Harris wasn’t saying, nor am I suggesting either, that Christian women don’t need to set standards for potential husbands, but when they expect the man they marry to be as mature as a John MacArthur, they are ignoring reality and a whole bunch of serious, committed Christian men who, by the grace of God, could be a MacArthur or Sproul in 10 or 20 years ... assuming they had a wife to help.

I think I might like it because it shifts some blame onto the girl instead of the guy (hey, well excuse me for getting tired of taking all the blame!). ;)

Just kidding - actually I’ve experienced this in the past unfortunately and it sucks.  Being compared with great fathers and pastors in a girl’s life is a great thing because that means that she has these great christian men to look to, but it also sucks because I will never be able to compare to someone who’s been at it for so many more years (and had a wife to help fine-tune it).

I think it’s important to not use this as an excuse and to slack off my responsibility as a christian man, I have a role that I was destined to fill and I need to strive to reach the point where I can do just that.

But there also needs to be an understanding that I’m still learning.  Heck, honestly I hadn’t put any real thought into my God-given responsibilities as a man who wishes to be a husband and father until just the last few years (I just figured it would come naturally whenever I got married - ha!). That’s a lot less than the 20 or so years nameless fathers, pastors and other Godly men have put in. There is a lot to learn and even more to unlearn, but as long as I keep a clear focus I hope to someday become someone that can be a role model for other young men trying to find their way in a world with too few true men role models.

Girls, just give us a chance here… we’re trying. =)

Here are some books that have been a great guide to me on this journey:
Wild At Heart - John Eldridge
No More Christian Nice Guy - Paul Coughlin
Boy Meets Girl - Joshua Harris

Also here’s an article that was linked on the original post - Faith For The Man He’ll Become. It’s aimed towards women but I still found it an interesting read.